
Each of us has built a collection of seemingly small losses in the last few years—cancelled trips, lost time with family, missed events like graduations and weddings. The accumulation of these disappointments weighs heavy and cultivates disenfranchised grief. This type of grief is difficult to identify, and a lot of us feel guilty honoring it. When others have suffered more, what right do we have to mourn our more minor losses?
I believe it is essential to acknowledge disenfranchised grief, to speak it to someone with whom we feel safe, and then to find alternative ways to enact small joys. I’ve recently felt a diffused, latent grumpiness. I didn’t understand why my temper was short, and I didn’t know why I was feeling emotional. When I paused and went within, I realized that my quiet little griefs had brought on a palpable mood shift. The second I acknowledged my disenfranchised grief, I felt the tension in my shoulders ease a bit. It’s okay to feel sad for the lost moments with loved ones and the vacations that never happened. As I let my grief evolve, I distract myself in lighthearted ways. The feelings of disappointment will diminish, and in the meantime, I counterbalance my grief with happy activities.
Memory Travel
With travel severely restricted and very stressful, I’ve mostly traveled through my past. The last two weeks, my 2015 trip to Italy’s Val d’Orcia has been on my mind. I’m reliving the early mornings on the deck, when the sun came up over the valley, the wild boars squealed, and the birds chirped. Day after day, I’ve been seeing the glorious Tuscan hills in my third eye and almost tasting the fruity olive oil we drizzled on our pasta. Rather than leave me with a sense of loss, my Italian reveries are fulfilling and hopeful.
Awaken the Senses
Throughout the pandemic, the kitchen has been my happy place. Meal preparation calls upon multiple senses. I see the bright produce I pull from the grocery shelves, touch the ingredients as I chop, smell the herbs as I rub them between my fingers, hear the vegetables sizzle in the olive oil, and taste the dish resulting from my labor. After tinkering with my winter minestrone soup, I am ready to share my recipe, found at the end of this post. Please make it your own! Dried beans are even more delicious than canned, and dried herbs can be used in a pinch. My winter minestrone will adjust to your whims, your pantry, and your senses.
Work It Out on the Mat
Sometimes the best way to deal with grief is through movement. This week, my yoga mat has been a place of respite. I admit I’m not pushing myself hard. My exercise is slow and intentional. In the weeks to come, I’ll be ready for more rigor. But for now, I just need to process loss and disappointment. I am learning that acknowledging my grief is uplifting.
Inspirations

We’re giving hugs again, gathering around tables with friends, and some people are even planning summer travels. We are “learning to human again.”
“I am that living and fiery essence of the divine substance that glows in the beauty of the fields. I shine in the water, I burn in the sun and the moon and the stars.” –Hildegard of Bingen (1098-1179)
Could you ever imagine being able to circumnavigate the city of Paris much like the 16th century explorer Magellan circumnavigated the Earth? Back in the late 19th century, such a form of transportation was made possible through the construction of the Petite Ceinture during the era of the Second Empire in France. In English, it translates to “little belt”, a connotation which rather undersells the immense scope and importance that this railway network possessed.
Deep in the heart of Paris, under the Gare de l’Est exists a perfectly preserved relic from WWII. Tucked away behind a secret hatch on the platform rests a WWII bunker completely undisturbed by time and modernization. A set of tunnels was built under the train station to help transport luggage, but when the war began, it was transformed into a safe haven. The bunker was initially created by the French government but was unfinished before the German military took over France and occupied Paris in 1940. Both the French and German government had wanted to keep the trains at this station running because there are tracks that lead into Germany.
The most macabre tourist attraction in Paris, the Catacombs, was initially a very practical solution to a serious 18th century sanitation problem. Cemeteries in Paris were overfull, so the remains needed to be moved to a separate, safer location underground. The skeletons were taken from many cemeteries around Paris, but primarily from les Saintes-Innocents, a very popular burial location for Parisians from the 12th to the 18th century.

In the 12th arrondissement of Paris exists a colorful and refreshing line of English styled cottages. This line of 35 residential and private houses is located on the famous Rue Crémieux; named after Jewish lawyer and advocate for human rights, Adolphe Crémieux. Avid users of social media are very familiar with this pastel painted street as it is known as, “Instagram’s most favorite street”. With one search, #RueCremieux will locate 31,000 images that have this hashtag. Proof, this enchanting stretch of houses has captured the attention of many and has served as the perfect backdrop for an Instagram post.
Nearly every tourist in Paris plans to visit the Louvre. The Louvre is seen as one of the quintessential French experiences, even though most of the art pieces it contains hail from other nations. Yet, when approaching the Louvre, tourists seem to be focused solely on the looming glass pyramid over the neatly cut treetops of the Jardin des Tuileries, completely missing the structure to their left. This imposing yet unassuming wing of the Louvre Palace houses le Musée des Arts Décoratifs, or MAD, one of the premier museums of Paris. The Musée des Arts Décoratifs is itself historical. Opening on May 29th, 1905, MAD has seen two World Wars, the end of the Cold War, and the establishment of the European Union by the time it was renovated between 1996 to 2006.