This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival […]
Welcome and entertain them all!
–Rumi
As we move into the holiday season, I find myself approaching each gesture with reverence. Zipping up my long, puffy jacket to meet the icy morning becomes an act of self-protection. Carving out 20 minutes to light a candle and practice yoga is a sort of prayer for a good night’s sleep.
These chilly, emotionally charged months call for tenderness. First and foremost, we must be tender with ourselves. I’ve spent the year learning to welcome all the emotions that arise. Exhilaration and sorrow both visited and stayed on for a while. Anger made its way through my guest house, but so did joy. When I tried to oust my uninvited guests, they hunkered down. In The Guest House, Rumi encourages us to
Be grateful for whatever comes,
Because each has been sent
As a guide from beyond.
At some point in this mind-boggling year, I stopped resisting the emotions I’d rather not feel. Sadness, grief, and outrage took up space in my house. I finally befriended them. I engaged with them. I ultimately tamed them. And then they left me. Allowing these guests to hang out for a while created an internal ease because I wasn’t focused on resisting them. My life went on, more or less uninterrupted. I traveled, I rested, and come fall, I threw myself into my work. All the while, I tended to my guests, moving through successive ups and downs.
I learned to be tender with the effects of betrayal and the deep hurt that ensues. I was patient with my healing process, extending grace to myself when I seemed to backslide. Thankfully, my house is now less crowded and far less confusing. Rumi teaches that unruly guests may be clearing you out for some new delight. I hope this is true. In the meantime, I’m content to move about my spacious, bright, relatively empty self.
Inspirations
Although there is much to be done in the coming days, I am taking a hygge day—choral Christmas music, ginger spice candle, fuzzy clothes, baking,and tea…